More You Know You’re a Writer If . . .
More signs that you’re afflicted with the condition known as WRITER:
–You are more anxious about your mailman showing up an hour late than your kids.
–The “sermon notes” section of the Sunday morning bulletin comes home every week filled in with ideas or scenes for your WIP.
–The only magazine quiz you regularly fill out is the vocabulary quiz in The Writer—and you score at least 18/20 every time and cut it out to hang on your fridge.
–Your idea of a vacation is going somewhere like Denver, Houston, Dallas, or Minneapolis to attend a writer’s conference, and you never leave the hotel.
–You have a hard time explaining what you “do.”
–You–hold on, I have to check my e-mail . . .
–You do everything you can think of to procrastinate from writing, then turn the light on in the middle of the night and furtively write a few hundred words because you feel guilty for not writing.
–You can predict the next line or conflict in just about every TV show/movie you watch.
–You don’t meet “new friends”; you meet “potential characters.”
–You stay in bed ten minutes after you wake up structuring the details of your dream into a novel synopsis, complete with character descriptions, setting, and costumes.
–You’ve ever had to replace your bathroom flooring because you decided you could get a few thoughts written down while waiting for the bathtub to fill.
–You have a cup or canister filled with pens and pencils in every room of the house—and yet you can never find a pen when you really need one. You also put the dry pens back in the cup, simply because it seems like a waste to throw away a perfectly good pen casing—one of these days, you might actually buy some refills.
–Your non-writing friends/family don’t like going to the movies with you, because you don’t walk out saying, “Yeah, that was good,” you walk out saying, “If I’d written that, I would have . . .”
–You spend more on “writing stuff” every year than you do on groceries and gas combined.
–You text-message yourself while out and about so you won’t forget a great name, a piece of dialogue, or a story idea you saw/heard while you were out.
–Conversations with friends start to include the question, “You’re not going to use that in your book, are you?”
–You think Paul Bettany’s portrayal of Chaucer in A Knight’s Tale is one of the most brilliant characters ever put on film . . . and you often quote several of his lines:
- Chaucer: I’m a writer.
Wat: A what?
Chaucer: A wha–a what? A writer. I write, with parchment, and ink. Geoffrey Chaucer’s the name, writing’s the game. You’ve read my book? the Book of the Duchess? No? Well, it was allegorical.
Roland: Well, we won’t hold that against you, that’s for every man to decide for himself.
……….
Chaucer: I will eviscerate you in fiction. Every pimple, every character flaw. I was naked for a day; you will be naked for eternity.
……….
Will: You lied . . .
Chaucer: Yes . . . yes I lied. I’m a writer, I give the truth scope!
–In a group discussion/debate, you can can always see the other person’s point of view—literally. You’re composing their internal dialogue, visceral and emotional reactions while they talk.
–You’re never bored, because your characters are always there to entertain you.
More “You Know You’re a Writer If . . .” Posts:
You Know You’re a Writer If . . .
Even MORE You Know You’re a Writer If . . .
You Know You’re A Writer If, Extended Edition
KayeDacus.com 
“–Your non-writing friends/family don’t like going to the movies with you, because you don’t walk out saying, “Yeah, that was good,” you walk out saying, “If I’d written that, I would have . . .””
I don’t watch too many movies because I dissect them and it drives people nuts. I do the same with books… I can rarely read for pleasure unless it’s a really good book.
Love the list 😀
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-Your house is a wreck, your hair is unwashed, and you’re still wearing your pajamas at 1 PM because you couldn’t pull yourself away from the keyboard…then when someone shows up unexpectedly, they ask if you’re sick.
It just happened to me moments earlier.
Thanks for the list, Kaye!
🙂 Heidi
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I do that too, Heidi!
“–You’re never bored, because your characters are always there to entertain you.”
AMEN!!!
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–In a group discussion/debate, you can can always see the other person’s point of view—literally.
–You can predict the next line or conflict in just about every TV show/movie you watch.
–You stay in bed ten minutes after you wake up structuring the details of your dream into a novel synopsis, complete with character descriptions, setting, and costumes.
*I wish!*
And my favorite: –You have a hard time explaining what you “do.”
Thanks for this, Kaye :o)
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Ahhhh! I’m afflicted! I’m a writer!
My favorite was the one about the email… 😀
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–You stay in bed ten minutes after you wake up structuring the details of your dream into a novel synopsis, complete with character descriptions, setting, and costumes.
Just happened to me half an hour ago….can’t find a pen and paper to scribble my notes, dang….
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I have to say, these are BRILLIANT. I LOVE CHAUCER!!!! I quote him all the time I LOVE him!!!!! These are SOOO great. Brilliant, actually.
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Once, I was waiting for the bathtub to fill up and I totally came up with an epic idea for my story… only I didn’t have a pencil or paper, and I was too worried the thought would leave me if I went to go get either one, so i found a sharpie in the cabinet, and wrote my idea’s down all down my legs, arms, and stomach. My parents thought I was totally wacked…. well, maybe I am a little bit…
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