I’ve spent many years pondering this community/isolation thing, because I love people, am very compassionate and have spent much of my life volunteering in ways that are focused on helping people. And yet God has put me in a place of much and frequent solitude for more than 10 years now. (I’m 47). I fretted about it at times, thinking I was doing something wrong, until I realized two things: 1) My Lord is calling me to a this place of solitude, and so it is good for me to be here; and 2) I do have community, and deep connections, just in different ways and less frequently than I was taught to believe I would/should have. But most “shoulds” are very deceptive; Tolstoy enlightened us more than 100 years ago to the hypocrisy of the social order of what we “should” do with our lives. Still, it’s so hard to break free from them.

There’s a definite peace that comes from knowing that today I’m sincerely trying to do what God wants me to be doing.

I’m finding your posts about Facebook and Twitter interesting, enlightening, and always thoughtfully intelligent. Is it sad that these are some primary sources of social interaction? I don’t know, but I don’t think so. I’m just getting to know Facebook, and find it a little frightening, but it is an effective tool for communication. I guess everything on this earth can become perverse; but, we still live on this earth, and you certainly need these modern tools of publishing/promoting for your livelihood; and it appears you’ve chosen a way to support yourself that doesn’t compromise your values. That’s certainly something to be glad about, not sad.

I don’t Twitter because I don’t have a cell phone. I’ve had one in the past, but I just don’t need one now, although I can imagine the day will come when I’ll feel the need again to have one.

My primary communication is still email, rather than Facebook, because I don’t like talking on the telephone, or the way it sounds when it rings (LOUD and disruptive); and I prefer a more intimate mode of address, one-on-one. But, that takes a lot of time. It’s not always possible, and for someone who has to make a living and also has fans to communicate with, it’s clearly not the wisest use of time.

Summary, I’m very old-fashioned. I live in the country, live a slow life. I write and reflect, I garden and preserve my produce, My husband and I make almost all my meals from scratch (I could never do that without his huge involvement). I have an appointment calendar I can keep in my head. I am grateful for technology tools which make it possible for me to have this pleasant, quiet life and still feel deeply connected to community. But my favorite way to connect will always be to share a meal, or a cup of coffee or tea, with someone I like, admire, care about, while talking, heart-to-heart.

I’ve been signed up with the Red Cross ever since Katrina, but until recently the training classes were never at times I could attend. Now I can.

And like Kaye, I’m looking into the local food bank. While I can’t help much due to their hours, they specify on their website that they often have evening and weekend hours for people to volunteer. With the big holidays coming up, I figured that would be a good use of time.

I’m also toying with Habitat for Humanity – I’ve volunteered back in college, and it would be a great way to learn some skills. Still thinking (praying) about that one though.

I think I’d been visiting my previous church (the one at which I’m still a member) for at least a month before I started meeting anyone, and that was only because I’d started visiting Sunday School classes (and yet still sat alone during worship service).

That was almost fifteen years ago, and that event became the standard by which we, rightly or wrongly, judge churches we’ve visited since — do they have a “Merv” attitude toward welcoming newcomers? We’ve struggled since then to find a church to “belong” to, and more than once we’ve said to each other, “We’re just looking for another Merv.” Haven’t found him (or her) yet.